Hoo’s ready for a laugh?
100 of the best owl jokes and barn owl puns, hand-picked by the Barn Owl Live team.
Looking for funny owl jokes? You’ve found a whole barn full. Our owl jokes for kids and grown-ups are the same ones we share with viewers in the live chat, from Doctor Hoo and Owlcatraz to the Mouse-carena.
Tap Guess the punchline to hide the answers and test your family, or hit Random joke for a surprise. Then come and watch our barn owls live on the Barn Owl Live YouTube channel.
Punchlines are hidden. Tap a blurred answer to reveal it.
What’s an owl’s favourite TV show?
Doctor Hoo!
What do you call a barn owl who works in a courtroom?
A barn-ister!
Where are all the convict owls sent?
Owlcatraz.
How can you tell a barn owl has been using your computer?
The mouse has gone missing!
What did the barn owl say to its friend who was feeling down?
“Don’t worry, be owl-right!”
What’s a barn owl’s favourite Queen song?
“Another Vole Bites the Dust!”
What’s a barn owl’s favourite breakfast cereal?
Mice Krispies!
What’s a barn owl’s favourite snack?
Mice cream!
What did the vet say to the bird who couldn’t stop hooting?
“I think you have a bad case of irritable owl syndrome.”
Why don’t barn owls give a hoot?
Because they screech instead!
What’s a barn owl’s favourite song to sing at karaoke?
“Owl By Myself!”
Why did the barn owl cough up a pellet?
It had a lot to get off its chest.
What did the owl say to the mouse?
“Nice to eat you!”
Did you hear about the genius scientist owl who made amazing inventions?
Owlbert Einstein.
What does a barn owl call a mouse on a skateboard?
Meals on wheels!
Two owls are playing pool. One says, “Two hits.”
The other replies, “Two hits to who?”
What’s a barn owl’s favourite subject at school?
Owl-gebra!
What does an owl say when it sneezes?
“A-hoo!”
Why are barn owls so romantic?
They wear their heart on their face.
What do you call a magical owl?
Hoo-dini!
What’s an owl’s favourite band?
The Hoo!
How does a barn owl answer the phone?
“Hoo’s calling?”
What’s a barn owl’s idea of a balanced diet?
A vole in each talon!
What’s a barn owl’s favourite film?
The Hootfather!
Why do owls make great security guards?
They love the night shift, and they’re always asking “Hoo goes there?”
What nursery rhyme do barn owls love?
Three Blind Mice. Easy pickings!
How do barn owls express surprise?
“Well, owl be darned!”
Why did the barn owl stay up all night wondering where the sun had gone?
Eventually, it dawned on him.
Which famous gangster was an owl?
Owl Capone!
What do you get if you cross an owl with a goat?
A hootenanny!
What did one owl say when it saw another fall out of a tree?
“I’m talon everyone about this!”
What’s a barn owl’s favourite pudding?
Chocolate mouse!
Which owl lived in Sherwood Forest?
Robin Hoot!
Why don’t owls revise for exams?
They prefer to wing it!
Did you hear about the three owl musketeers?
Owl for one and one for owl!
What does a barn owl call a field full of voles?
A drive-through!
What’s a barn owl’s favourite book?
Of Mice and Men. Well, the first half anyway.
What do owls wear on a cold night?
Hoot-ies!
What song do owls sing when the farm dogs escape?
“Hoo Let the Dogs Out!”
What do you call a clever owl?
A know-it-owl!
Why did the barn owl bring a pencil to the tree?
To draw some owlsome sketches!
What’s an owl’s favourite kind of mystery?
A whoo-dunnit!
What do owls drink before bed?
Owl-vintine!
Why did the owl get thrown out of the cinema?
It kept asking “Hoo’s that?” all the way through the film.
What’s a barn owl’s favourite season?
Owl-tumn!
Which famous boxer was an owl?
Muhammad Owl-i!
What happens if an owl has bad breath?
It smells owl-ful!
How do owls make decisions?
They flip a coin. Hoots or tails?
What’s a barn owl’s favourite social media platform?
Owl-stagram!
Why did the owl give up his job as a baker?
He couldn’t make enough dough.
What did the owl say at its wedding?
“I hoo!”
What’s a barn owl’s favourite James Bond film?
Mouse-raker!
What do you call an owl with a sore throat?
A bird that can’t give a hoot!
What’s a barn owl’s favourite Christmas treat?
Mice pies!
What’s a barn owl’s favourite dance?
The Mouse-carena!
Why are owls brilliant at reverse parking?
They can turn their heads 270 degrees!
What do you call an owl who causes trouble at football matches?
A hoo-ligan!
Which famous poet was an owl?
Owl-fred, Lord Tennyson!
What’s a barn owl’s favourite type of footwear?
Hoots!
What’s an owl’s favourite game?
Beak-a-boo!
How does a barn owl apologise?
“I’m owl-fully sorry!”
Where do owls do their food shopping?
Mice-land!
What’s a barn owl’s favourite holiday?
Hoot-oween!
Why did the owl give up plumbing?
He decided to just go with the flow.
What do owls say at midnight on New Year’s Eve?
“Happy Hoo Year!”
What’s a barn owl’s favourite type of music?
Owl-ternative rock!
What’s a barn owl’s favourite musical?
Les Mice-érables!
What does an owl say when it’s not sure?
“Hoo knows?”
Which TV quiz do barn owls love?
The Chase. They’re very good at it!
What’s a barn owl’s favourite kind of sandwich?
A mouse-tard sandwich!
Which famous nurse was an owl?
Florence Night-owl!
Why did the baby owl go to school?
To become a wise guy!
What’s an owl’s favourite Beatles song?
“Owl You Need Is Love.”
Which Jedi was an owl?
Owl-bi-Wan Kenobi!
What did the barn owl write in its Valentine’s card?
“Owl be yours forever!”
What’s an owl’s favourite pizza topping?
Mouse-arella!
Why did the barn owl cross the road?
To prove it wasn’t chicken!
What’s an owl’s favourite game show?
Hoo Wants to Be a Millionaire?
What’s an owl’s favourite Lionel Richie song?
“Owl Night Long.”
What do owls sing at birthday parties?
“Happy Birthday to Hoo!”
Why was the owl so grumpy?
It was having a bad feather day.
What’s an owl’s favourite fairy tale?
Little Red Riding Hoot!
Why is an owl the best pub quiz teammate?
It always knows Hoo’s Hoo!
What’s an owl’s favourite film and catchphrase?
The Verminator: “Owl be back!”
What game do barn owls play at parties?
Pass the pellet!
Where do owls keep their savings?
In a nest egg!
What’s an owl’s favourite musical instrument?
The hoo-kulele!
What did the doctor say was wrong with the owl?
Hooping cough.
What did Shakespeare’s owl say?
“To-whit or not to-whit, that is the question.”
What do owls shout when their team scores?
“Hoo-ray!”
Where do owls go on holiday?
The Owl-garve!
What’s a barn owl’s favourite chocolate?
Owl-tesers!
What’s a barn owl’s favourite crisp flavour?
Mice and vinegar!
Why did the owl become a stand-up comedian?
Everyone said it was a real hoot!
What’s an owl’s favourite fairground game?
Hoot-la!
Which owl solves crimes at 221B Baker Street?
Sherlock Hoolmes!
Why did the barn owl join the RAF?
It wanted to be a Wing Commander!
Where do barn owls go on a school trip?
The Mouse-eum!
Why do owls never go courting in the rain?
Because it’s too wet to woo!
What does an owl say after telling a bad joke?
“Owl see myself out.”